The "5th Year Senior" is a unique member of the fraternity. In his prime he had adopted fraternity life to the extremes: drinking everyday and night, never going to class, and doing more drugs than you could shake a stick at. As a result of this appalling behavior, the "5th Year Senior" was either kicked out of school for disciplinary issues stemming from his fratalicious attitude or simply didn't have enough credits to graduate on time. Consequently, he returned for his fifth year as a bitter and cynical person. A dinosaur in a land of modernity, he is often referred to as "old balls."

He cares little for the well-being of the fraternity and appears highly self-interested and stand-offish, both in his thoughts and daily actions. Believing his college years were incomparable to those currently in the fraternity, the "5th Year Senior" often tells stories about the "good old days," when times were different and they partied like it was 1999.